Wednesday, October 3, 2007


1. The major attribute of a character is expectation:

2. Any time a character enters a scene, said character has expectations:
a--of pleasure (intellectual, sensual, artistic)
b--of displeasure
c--of adventure
d--of being bored
e--of being surprised

3. Any time a character, in anticipation of a-e supra, does not enter a particular scene, said character nevertheless has expectations:
a--of repercussions
b--of pleasure (intellectual, sensual, artistic)
c--of experiencing relief

4. Although many characters would like to be agreed with:
a--they suspect some conflict
b--they act as though they will be
c--they know better
d--they chose to enter a state of denial as well defined as the present landscape

5. In their desire to be agreed with, some characters offer:
a--sexual favors
b--vegetarian pizza
c--pizza with pepperoni
e--hard facts
f--soft facts

6. A character who has no expectations
a--is like an Edsel--bad design
b--is like a piece of floating driftwood
c--is difficult to believe
d--is waiting for divine guidance

7. A character who has expectations
a--is a participant in an impending train wreck
b--is a protagonist
c--is an antagonist
d--is a liberal

8. The nature of a character's expectations renders said character
c--worth rooting for
d--worth rooting against
e--a nut case

9. In general, characters who have expectations of Nature appear
a--in harmony with their essential nature
b--good winners

10. In general, characters who have expectations of investments and inheritances seem
b--poor winners

11. Characters are defined by what they expect from
c--sexual encounters
d--lack of sexual encounters
e--hearing about other characters' sexual encounters
f--justice systems

12. Characters who expect happy endings are
a--constantly nervous
b--constantly suspicious
d--not very funny
e--okay, maybe a little funny

13. Characters who expect unhappy endings are
a--often torn between religious faith and an understanding of the human condition
d--maybe a little funny

P.S. We are characters
P.P.S We appear in the dramas of other characters
P.P.P.S We are maybe a little funny.
But not as funny as Kristol and Podhoretz.

1 comment:

R.L. Bourges said...

Fiction Master Class in a post, Shelly.