Saturday, November 10, 2007

Random Excess Memory

1. Individuals in Twelve-step recovery programs find writing first-person narrative threatening.

2. Persons who call you by the honorific Sir or Ma'am are patronizing you.

3. Persons who outrace you to the available loo have a sense of entitlement.

4. A subset of #3 supra is that they think you have live a life style that has diminished the strength of your kidneys.

5. Persons who are intimidated by dogs often have one of both parents who have short tempers.

6. Persons who preface a question to you with, Now I know it's none of my business, really think it is.

7. Individuals who complain about the rudeness of contemporary teenagers are often guilty of rudeness to teenagers.

8. Individuals who praise the music of Wagner tend to enjoy the novels of Ayn Rand.

9. After seeing the film "Five Easy Pieces," it is difficult not to smile whenever a waitress repeats your instruction to hold something, cheese, lettuce, onion, nor to laugh aloud if she asks if you want to hold the chicken.

10. Individuals who have little or no confidence tend to resent persons who have too much.

11. The odds of getting competent directions to a nearby restroom increase in inverse proportion to the amount over the age of fifty is the person you ask.

12. Tourists who ask you directions to an authentic Mexican restaurant have no idea what authentic Mexican food is.

13. What is the first poem you can remember remembering?

14. Does it seem feasible that Georg W. Bush is addicted to video games?


lettuce said...

Hah, yes, No. 7 is true indeed I think.
11. made me laugh out loud.

13. AA Milne, "the king asked the queen and the queen asked the dairy maid 'could he have some butter for the royal slice of bread?'"

also "Whenever i walk in a london street" (still know all of that)

and thirdly, a stevie smith poem about Fafnir.

(see, I can never limit myself to solely the information which was requested....)

x said...

You are a true genius of associative thinking, free association, creative thinking, whatever you want to call it. I love your random lists. I'm curious what you will free associate for the meme I tagged you for.

R.L. Bourges said...

1 - as well they must

6 these are the same people who askd: "when did you last water your plants?"

10 conversely, the overconfident often patronize the confidence-challenged

11 except in Istanbul

13 it's either "now i lay me down to sleep i pray the lord my soul to keep, if i should die before i wake, i pray the lord my soul to take" or the much cheerier "i'm the king of the castle and you're the dirty rascal"

Pod said...